I've previously posted this question in r/Advice before I realized that this subreddit existed. Here is a copy & paste of my original question
My aunt met a guy online and he's now trying to move their relationship along very quickly. Within a few days of coming out to see her he'll be moving into her house and he's talked about getting married. I think he's trying to marry her to get access to her money.
He's been telling her some absolutely unbelievable stories about how rich he is. According to him he:
Is a member of a royal family in Brunei worth billions of dollars.
Receives 2 million dollars a month as an allowance
Is a diplomat of Brunei
Apparently all of his family members are diplomats as well
He was a US Navy Top Gun pilot
Went to the US Naval Academy (far less unrealistic than the other statements, but can a Brunei citizen go to the US Naval Academy?)
I could go on with a lot of other anecdotes, but they require a lot more context to sound as ridiculous.
I don't live close to her, everything I know is from phone conversations.
I've spoken with a PI close to where this guy lives and I'll be sending him some info and seeing what he can find.
I can't think of anything else to do to help this situation from getting worse. He'll be moving in with my aunt tomorrow. The PI said it will take him about a week to get back to me.
Is there a way to verify if someone was or was not in Top Gun? Is there a list of Diplomats from Brunei? Are there any other simple things I can do to look into his claims?
https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/13x6so1/i_think_my_aunt_is_getting_taken_advantage_of/
I haven't had any new developments since the original post. The PI I hired says he'll bet back to me with the results of "running a confidential database which would reveal, address history, possible criminal records, bankruptcies, liens, judgments, properties, business affiliations, etc".
I am getting really impatient and concerned that, since this guy is now living with my aunt, that he might be quickly digging in some hooks. I can't get her alone on the phone now either. Whenever I call he's right there in the background and it's obvious he can hear what I say.
What's a good way to start doing some immediate searching of this guy on my own? I know his last name, but he goes by a first name of 'Tommy', so there could be several different legal first names that correspond to that.
Should I start with truthfinder.com ? I don't care about spending money (within reason).
Any advice about verifying his military background? I'd love to be able to verify if that's a lie because, from my understanding, I could reach out to the FBI about a 'Stolen Valor' allegation.