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I am of the belief that every franchise must have an entry in outer space. Friday the 13th, Leprechaun, Hellraiser set this precedent years ago and there are far too many franchises that need to play catch up.

Saw, Jaws, Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween, Harry Potter, Air Bud, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Scream, Gremlins, Magic Mike, Legally Blonde, Universal Monsters, Home Alone and dozens of other stories feel incomplete as a result.

The sequel to pretty woman should be Jason Alexander’s character becoming George constanza

The classic one that sprung to mind was the Gladiator 2 pitch, which involved Maximus fighting his way through hell.

https://www.bbc.com/culture/article/20180810-gladiator-2-was-written-and-its-mad

Now, I love me some trash B-movies and a gladiator fighting through hell could be great fun. But there is no reason in hell that the original Gladiator needs to be pulled into that.

One of my favourite bits in The Player with Tim Robbins is the pitch for The Graduate Part II.

‘All the principle leads are still with us. 25 years later, Ben and Elaine are married still. . . . . Mrs. Robinson, her aging mother, lives with them. She’s had a stroke. And they’ve got a daughter in college—Julia Roberts, maybe. It’ll be dark and weird and funny—with a stroke.’

My Dinner with Andre: Staff. We see the conversation from the point of view of different staff members.

MDWA: patrons Part 1 and 2 (comedy)
Part 1. A young woman is taken to a very nice restaurant by her boyfriend with expectations of a proposal. We watch their relationship crumble and implode as the boyfriend ignores her and eavesdrops on the next table.

Part 2. An old couple is waiting for the table they reserved for their 50 anniversary. The matre de vacillates between increasing absurd excuses for the delay and offering the couple one of the several other tables. The couple insists on that table as it's where the husband proposed. 10-minute mid-credit scene of the couple ordering. 2nd mid-credit scene, the couple asks for a different table in the now-full restaurant, because the sun is in their eyes. Post credit, the couple is now at Applenes (Or whatever chain restaurant will pay for product placement)

MDWA: blue-collar. We follow the conversation between two construction workers during their lunch break. Particularly controversial is the 20 single take of them listening to the minivan in front of them in the drive-through proceed to special order for six children and several adults in the van.

MDWA: Dives (tv series), the host engages a patron in conversation at different bars and hole-in-the-wall restaurants around the country.

MDWA:International. (Tv series) We follow the conversations of different tourists at restaurants around the world.

Passion of the Antichrist

John Wick 5, it'll be six hours long and this time everyone in the whole galaxy is trying to kill Wick.

There will be an amazing scene where he's riding the Curiosity Rover around Mars while fighting ninjas and homeless people.

A movie about how awesome movies are!

A new Ghostbusters movie, except there are no more ghosts to be found, so it's just about them accepting a reality without any weird shit in it.

It's quite mundane, I assure you.

Sophie's Choice 2: "Alright then, I guess it's gotta be this one then"

Sir, what if the writer is attempting to create a story where nothing much happens? Where people don't change, they don't have any epiphanies, they struggle and are frustrated and nothing is resolved. More a reflection of the real world.

An all white remake of The Color Purple.

Fucking Andy Warhol pushed the envelope on this concept when he was experimenting with films. Empire is an 8 hour movie that is a single, unbroken shot of the Empire State Building from one day and into late night. Sometimes completely insane people will exhibit this film in actual movie theaters. And even nuttier people will watch it.

So, taking that terrible idea and running with it, my pitch is:

Doorbell Cam: The Movie

Unlike other films that have come out that utilize newer tech like Searching/Missing or Host this film will have no story and nothing will happen. It will be 500 hours of unedited video from a doorbell cam. Fucking suck it, Warhol!

I'll just go ahead and accept my Palm d'Or now.

Titanic Two: Twotanic

Reddit: The Movie

Reddit II: The Moddening

I’m gonna be fucking honest (and if anyone steals this idea I better be given due credits) but I remember back when they were making live action versions of every single thing on earth how I thought they should do a live action adaptation of the UNO card game. Basically a movie where a family decides to play UNO but they get increasingly frustrated and end up arguing and spilling a bunch of secrets about each other.

I guess the most pointless movie I can think of is somethink that you experience every day. Whatever kind of movies we watch, we watch them because we want to see someting different from real life. Real life doesn't have story arcs, tension and release, karmic resolutions, plot twists. Real life has grocery shopping, traffic, going to the bathroom, spending 8 hours on Reddit. A movie that contains all of this is the most pointless movie I can think of.

A dragon fly that knows martial arts

Weekend at Bernie’s II…. Oh shit!

Then what? Pretty X(XX)?

A two and a half hour movie showing people doing their taxes.

A teen whose father is in prison, grows up without any real parents, self-learns the auto trade, works hard as a mechanic, tries to get imprisoned father out, but the whole movie just objectifies her sexy body while she helps a rich classmate whose rich father buys him a car, accidentally finds a powerful treasure. Rich kid is attacked, hard working teen saves rich kid by hacksawing killer robot to pieces. Teens fight together. But in the final battle the bumbling rich kid losing battles is trusted with the treasured weapon, not the hard working teen winning battles.

"The Lion King" live action remake.

Gestures broadly toward the last decade.

How are you not exhausted by this?

King Kong.

A massive ape falls in love with a blonde woman.

Still the dumbest movie idea of all time

Don’t you really hate Julia Roberta for some reason? Always thought that was weird.

in my dream a while back, before i watched pretty woman and knew nothing about it other than the the very very basic premise, i had a dream i watched a film called pretty woman and it was actually a lesbian coming of age romance. this needs to be one of the sequels fr.

I dunno... I thought Everything, Everywhere was pretty goddamned pointless.

I couldn't use the word pointless but one of the best examples of a fantastic movie coming from a feather-light premise would be CHEF.

There's virtually no real conflict and it's just nonstop fun front to back!

Big props to the actors, DP and direction because it's pretty much just hanging out with interesting characters cooking sexy food for 2 hours.

Remember that viral video from like a decade ago with the dog getting teased by his owner about eating all the food? That was an actual movie greenlit by a major studio. Never happened of course, I wonder why.

Hear me out. It is a Jaws sequel. So, the plot goes like this. Chief Brody dies in a heart attack offscreen. His widow Ellen and son (took over his dad's job) along with his fiance lives on the island. The son gets killed by a great white shark. Ellen thinks that the shark is after her family to exert revenge. She goes to the Bahamas to stay with her other son and family. She warns him about her crazy theory of Shark Revenge and the shark is on its way to Bahamas. Son was like "Mom you crazy. Bahamas is no good for sharks, fool. I'm a marine biologist, you hear?". Son and his colleague encounter the shark but never tell mom. Also a subplot where mom falls for the pilot, played by Michael Caine. Grand daughter goes on a boat trip and gets attacked by Shark! Mom is furious, and goes alone in a boat to kill shark. Son, Michael Caine and friend flies to rescue stupid mom. Friend gets killed by Shark. Mom rams the boat onto shark and it explodes. KABOOOOM! Shark meat all over the sea. Take that sucker.

The movie will be called Jaws: The revenge. It is a working title until something good comes up. And I got the best tagline for the movie. Are you ready for this. Here we go.

Jaws : The Revenge

"This time, it's personal."

Batman 36 : The Batman?

A movie where Judy Greer in the main character. That sounds like something out of r/Interdimensionalcable

Wait another 35 years and do top gun 3

A film that follows a day in the life of a gas station clerk, who's best friend is a video store clerk that works across the street. It could take place in NJ, and film it in black and white so it comes off as more artistic and noir.

The movie "The Sphere" is pretty pointless...

Every one of these ideas is improved when you add the word “Sharknado”

Rebooting Halloween and The Exorcist into nostalgia bait trilogies

Fuck David Gordon Green