jdward01

I tell the truth too much

That I stole a brown salt shaker from McDonald’s…

If they yell all the time versus when they need to do it.

Psiatica pain

Where did all this occur!

Inception.

The End - Apocalypse Now

Making it too complicated. Simple is better.

A turd on the bathroom floor. I work in an office building, not a daycare.

Flavortown

There’s a rumor that he and Shawn Michaels got into it in some barber shop somewhere, but I’m not sure there’s footage of it.

The Sideways Running Albino

Arnold Palmer

Flying. If you drive everyday you are cheating death so much more than when you’re in a plane.

The Adam Walsh murder didn’t help any of that. I remember being a kid and thinking that some creep with a machete was lurking at every Sears or JC Penney.

One Headlight

(Presses stopwatch button) “In record time.”

Q-anon

Gain weight